Being a Mother, Being Selfless.

“Women, more precisely mothers, are the embodiment of Love, Compassion, Selfless and much more.” Yes this is what I believed in when my cousins got pregnant, my friends got pregnant or whenever I saw a mother. Until one day a conversation which I heard on radio made me think. “Are all mothers really selfless, loving and compassionate”?

This may sound a bit retaliating to all the mothers around reading this post. Before you get judgmental about the post, let me tell u, this is how I reacted too when I heard that conversation. But after I heard the entire conversation it made me think and that’s the reason for this post.



Let me introduce myself, am from the garden city, which was once upon a time retired people’s paradise-Bengaluru. Born to a totally in and out Brahmin Amma and Appa, as a young girl I used to have a lot of questions why, what and how? Amma’s answers never convinced me. Well the confused young girl became an adult and she chose her profession and started working too as a Dentist.

I used to travel every day from Rajajinagar to Koramangala in bus to reach my work place. As any other person, I would always choose the window seat cause the splash of the early morning air along with your earphones and music…aaah perfect it would just energize every cell in your body and it would get a curve on your face.

And it was the same kind of a day when I took the bus from majestic to Koramangala. As usual I managed to get a window seat, earphones plugged, music was on. Apparently that day I was listening to a song from a movie called Filhaal,“yeh lamha”.(means This moment) on one of the radio stations. Then I happened to just tune searching for some good songs on radio changing stations, when I heard a conversation, it was in Kannada (one of the south Indian languages spoken in the state of Karnataka).it was two mature people, in their oldies talking and I was like oh man! And when I happen to change the station, I heard the word “Thayithana” (meaning motherhood), I stopped, increased the volume to listen as to what they were talking.

There were two elder people talking, two ladies one of them was a saint and the other was the one who was asking her questions about Motherhood. Then I thought what’s wrong with the radio people “how will a saint who has never had kids talk about motherhood”. I was curious still to know what she would talk. She was actually talking about her journey to be a saint and her experiences, with her guru, but I wasn’t looking for that, I was interested in the word motherhood which I had heard during the conversation.

I continued to listen waiting for her to talk about motherhood and there, she finally spoke what I waited for. She (saint) was from a well to do family and was well educated. She and her guru once were travelling in the train in general compartment along with other followers. General compartments are famous for stinking toilets and poor people. There are no specific berths to sit or even sleep. She being from a well to do family it was quiet difficult for her to even sit. It was almost 24hrs journey. She sat near the window grumbling and irritated, beside her a blue sari lady with her five year old son and 1 year old baby girl came and sat. Guru was also sitting in front of her.

The train started. The five year old boy was very naughty. This was the reason for more irritation. Then the little boy started to have loose motions and vomiting.It wasn’t stopping no matter what. All night he was vomiting and had loose motions. Instead of taking him, to the Bathroom his mother the Blue sari lady asked him to do it in the place where he was and then would clean it as the kid had become weak. Morning the saint (She) got up and happen to stamp the faeces which wasn’t cleared by the kids mom as she was asleep too. She (saint) got irritated and she started shouting on the blue sari lady the boy’s mother and that’s when the Guru said “Stop what’s wrong”. She told what happened. But guru smiled and said “so what if he had done and it wasn’t cleaned, u could clean it”

She was surprised, she thought guru would shout the same way how she did. She said “why should I”?

He said “are u a woman”? She said yes “I am”

He said “if the kid was your brother’s son or sister’s son would you do? She said “yes”

He said “Why?  She said “causes I love my brother’s or sister’s baby, cause I am compassionate”

He said then “why can’t you clean now”

Then she continued to tell in her conversation with the RJ. “He was so right, the sense of just being the mother to your offspring wasn’t motherhood”. It’s the selfless feeling of a woman what makes her the best creature of the God- “MOTHER”. God gave the power only to women to bring new life into the world, to love, to be a mother. Women are considered to be the embodiment's of Love, Compassion and Selflessness. She ended the conversation by Quoting this statement ,Are we really living it up or just claiming to be the ones?

I was confused, stuck. All day at work I started to think about my reactions and actions, am I compassionate and selfless? I’m not a mother yet. So I decided to ask people who had kids. I asked few in office they said being selfless to our own kids is a big sacrifice who cares what happens with other kids. But I argued Mother is a mother no matter what. Her feelings should remain to be compassionate for any kid right. Everyone laughed and tea break got over.

I still think what the guru told was right. What’s the point in claiming we are selfless when we aren’t? If we could just love and be selfless and compassionate to every kid we met, we would create a lot of difference. You don’t have to have your own baby to be a mother if you are selfless and compassionate to every kid you meet that’s enough.

I am one.

“Women more precisely mothers are the embodiment of love, compassion, selfless and much more.” Are we really living up to it? If we were or are then the world will surely become a great place to live in.